Big surprise, there seems to be a dearth of white men/black women in Boston to study and interview on the topic of interracial relationships; so the hunt is on for participants.
But, that being said, it seems that the study is only open to residents of
Image by OtterFreak via Flickr. Tell me a skinny sista like Aisha shouldn't be in an interracial sitcom.
Well, it looks as though mainstream media can only ignore the topic of interracial marriages for so long…so at least we’re tossed an interracial family or “romcom” sitcom from Alex Herschlag/Ellen DeGeneres.
On the matter of Ellen…I want to like her. I really do. I just don’t get her. Would she be as successful if she were not blonde and blue-eyed? A blonde-haired, blue-eyed woman who dances and tells bad jokes. Fine. I just wish she were a little bit more funny and more cutting-edge like Margaret Cho, Aisha Tyler, or so many others. But maybe that middle of the road approach is what’s working for her. Ho-hum.
The sitcom is supposed to be about a Jewish-Chinese couple and their home life and relationships. Obviously, Ms. Cho ought to be involved in this one at least in some capacity, but not likely since Ellen’s already has it.
But I’ll take an interracial sitcom that has the potential to be good over another bland-as-beige one any time.
Here’s the link to the article if you’d like to learn more about the upcoming interracial family sitcom:
Just imbibing the morning energy drink(less acid than your typical cup of joe
Image via Wikipedia.
and actually more affordable) and checking out some random blogs, reading through all kinds of online “foolishness and mayhem,” (to quote Niecy Nash), on the topic of interracial dating, interracial marriage, bi-racial children, and so forth.
Maybe white men could never “satisfy” black women one blogger postulates, or would all “white boys” be nerdy goofballs asked another woman, or could they turn out to be stalkers asked comedienne Sommore (in at least one of her concert films and the rom-com “Something New“), or could white guys not be “tough”enough to protect you asked yet another.
Cover of Something New (Widescreen Edition). Uh-oh...what will her girlfriends think?
Now, obviously, on the matter of interracial dating, we’re definitely for it, but it ultimately comes down to an issue of emotional maturity.
How much of your “free will” is determined by over-bearing parents, society, religious organizations or institutions, peer pressure, or fear of the new and different? To what extent do you as an individual want to be in a mutually-loving relationship and how does that weigh against being approved of by others?
If a man (or woman) doesn’t want to commit or take you seriously or won’t pay bills or cheats, it won’t matter whether they’re a taste of cocoa or some smooth vanilla creme. It’s time to motor.
And if you’re open to diversity, than you have a wider selection to choose from, a larger dating pool, and mathematically a greater chance at finding the type of person who will clip your toenails, make breakfast for both of you, and make you happy in other ways.
So, at any rate, it was difficult for me not to feel at least a tad better (after wading through all that internet dross material), when I came upon this article on (at least some) legitimate reasons for black women to be more open-minded when considering whether or not to date white men (yes, men).
Image via Wikipedia. Ralph Richard Banks, author of the book that's pretty much accepted knowledge, but sistas seem to be in disagreement with, regardless. Is he wrong to ask black women to be more open-minded? What if this cat were white/caucasian?
Stanford law professor Ralph Richard Banks‘ book advocating interracial marriage, Is Marriage for White People?: How the African American Marriage Decline Affects Everyone, unsurprisingly continues to stir up much-needed (albeit superficial and ultimately pointless) debate.
This is not to deny in any way the effects of institutionalized racism in American culture, which is as much a part of America (at this point) as iconic imagery of Uncle Sam and the proverbial apple pie; but to debate the clear disparity in marriage equality and marriage pools available while the problem continues along its course unabated…seems, well, saddening and unnecessary and devoid of simple reason.
Obviously, an online magazine called Interrace is not going to be against interracial marriage or dating; so we stand in favor of it. But we’re also in favor of equality across the board. So, if it’s alright for virtually every other ethnic/racial group to intermarry, why is this an issue for black women? Or is it not an issue at all? If we go by the general majority of reactions to Ralph Richard Banks’ little ditty, black women ain’t havin’ no cream in their coffee, whether the cream likes to coffee or not.
The disparities and scenarios the author presents seem fairly sound and recognized, and the ultimate situation is pretty much agreed upon; so why does there appear to be a general rejection or surprise over the book and the author’s conclusion?
The children were told that those with blue eyes were superior to those with brown eyes; and that the blue eyed children would be allowed more play time and receive other perks as well – since, of course, they were not as messy or as slow as the brown-eyed children.
After a little while, the brown eyed children were forced to wear special collars, and were more regularly mocked and derided by blue eyed students for perceived flaws and slovenly character traits.
If a brown eyed child make a mistake or was slow or cried, it would be pointed out that it was because of that child’s inferior state of being. S/he couldn’t help it, because sh/e was just naturally inferior, anyway.
Jan Elliot is a pioneer in what is now called “diversity training,” or “sensitivity training,” before it existed as now know it.
Undoubtedly, Jane Elliot could not teach children her anti-racism instruction in today’s private or parochial schools without eventually having some manner of legal action taken against her-and certainly she has (and continues to) receive negative or misunderstood reactions to what she’s trying to inculcate in (now) adults.
She came to the conclusion eventually that racism and prejudice are indeed taught, but that also, more importantly, that what can be taught can also be un-taught…at least to some extent.
Of course, “un-learning” (to paraphrase George W. Bush) racism takes time. Lots of time. And she’s a strong-willed, conscientious educator for continuing her mission.
If you’d like to learn more about Jane Elliot’s experiences in teaching “anti-racism” and how she does it, take some time to watch these truly eye-opening (pun intended) videos to get the proverbial ball rolling:
Part 1:
Part 2:
Part 3:
Part 4:
Frontline’s “A Class Divided” episode featuring Jane Elliot and her classes/training shows all 3 videos in one website, that also has teaching note and a great interview with Jane Elliot:
Image via Wikipedia. Hey, he DOES have a good voice.
Well, well, well, Askmen.com has an interesting little article on interracial dating, featuring a kind of creepy photography of Heidi Klum recoiling from Seal as he tries to kiss her.
Anyway, the article written by Dr. Wendy Walsh, proposes that a woman’s “special monthly” cycle (that men cannot fathom) influences how she is attracted (or not) to men outside of her “racial” boundary lines.
I guess that means in lay terms, that if a woman is in a particularly foaming-at-the-mouth, I’d-like-to-punch-your-face-through-the-other-side-of-your-head moment, she may feel like dealing with male harassment? Or adhering (or breaking from) socially-acceptable norms?
Your humble El Jefe has his own views on the matter, but far be it for moi to try to influence your emotional and spiritual peregrinations, friends. Read the piece and let me know if it makes sense to you.
Whenever I read the term “marrying out,” it always makes me think of ordering out. I guess if you can’t get what you’d normally get at home, you have to pick up the cell and “marry out.”
How much of societal stress and pressure over interracial dating and marriage is about finding what society accepts as norm and how much of this is about finding a loving partner, regardless of race or ethnicity?
Let us know your thoughts.
Here’s a link to this brief piece from the website HispanicOhio.com, by Jeffrey Passel, Wendy Wang, and Paul Taylor:
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Book on Interracial Marriage Continues to Confound
In Main Event, Opinion on September 28, 2011 at 4:05 pmImage via Wikipedia. Ralph Richard Banks, author of the book that's pretty much accepted knowledge, but sistas seem to be in disagreement with, regardless. Is he wrong to ask black women to be more open-minded? What if this cat were white/caucasian?
Stanford law professor Ralph Richard Banks‘ book advocating interracial marriage, Is Marriage for White People?: How the African American Marriage Decline Affects Everyone, unsurprisingly continues to stir up much-needed (albeit superficial and ultimately pointless) debate.
Rather than causing any kind of cultural mass discussions (such as a serious roundtable discussion hosted by someone like Tavis Smiley or Dr. Cornel West), we have an infinite number of bloggers (present company excluded) refusing to read the book (http://www.urbanfaith.com/2011/09/the-intermarriage-solution.html/), debating the book’s legitimacy or perspective (http://www.collegeadmission.com/elect/app/app?service=external/Forum&sp=35999), feeling besieged (http://www.blackvoicenews.com/news/news-wire/46823-successful-black-marriages-besieged-on-all-sides-say-advocates.html), resentful (http://www.kansascity.com/2011/09/20/3156218/black-women-and-the-angst-over.html); all of them pretty much gauging an already-sore eye in the face of the blatant fact that black women continue to strive forward with a mathematically diminishing return “on investment” so to speak.
This is not to deny in any way the effects of institutionalized racism in American culture, which is as much a part of America (at this point) as iconic imagery of Uncle Sam and the proverbial apple pie; but to debate the clear disparity in marriage equality and marriage pools available while the problem continues along its course unabated…seems, well, saddening and unnecessary and devoid of simple reason.
Obviously, an online magazine called Interrace is not going to be against interracial marriage or dating; so we stand in favor of it. But we’re also in favor of equality across the board. So, if it’s alright for virtually every other ethnic/racial group to intermarry, why is this an issue for black women? Or is it not an issue at all? If we go by the general majority of reactions to Ralph Richard Banks’ little ditty, black women ain’t havin’ no cream in their coffee, whether the cream likes to coffee or not.
The disparities and scenarios the author presents seem fairly sound and recognized, and the ultimate situation is pretty much agreed upon; so why does there appear to be a general rejection or surprise over the book and the author’s conclusion?
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